70 Comments
User's avatar
Dean Robertson's avatar

Have to add this one that I've posted somewhere before but I never get enough of it:

"I don't know who might need to hear this right now, but--if you're going through a rough time, don't cut your bangs."

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Maggie's avatar

And boy is THAT the truth.

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David Levine's avatar

I grew and WORE bangs for a short time in late '69. and THAT was pretty ill-advised. it worked a little better with my black velvet Carnaby Street suit and apricot ruffle-front shirt. it was suitable for any wedding, and there were quite a few back then. then I broke the ceiling of 140 pounds and it was all over.

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Karen RN's avatar

Thanks TC, I love these! Laughter is the best medicine after all. Three crows were sitting on a fence and a fourth one tried to join them. It was reported as an attempted murder.

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TCinLA's avatar

OK - I Laughed Out Loud.

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FERN MCBRIDE (NYC)'s avatar

Thanks for a fresh laugh, Karen.

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Dave Conant - MO's avatar

Some humor, some groaners, and a fair amount of wisdom. Thanks TC.

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Ally House (Oregon)'s avatar

Thanks for the chuckle, TC!

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Kate Bergam's avatar

I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.

Sounds like a Real Housewives tagline

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Elizabeth M. (Massachusetts)'s avatar

These are delightful! Thank you for the chuckles. I have too many favorites to mention.

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Elizabeth M. (Massachusetts)'s avatar

And about the latest senseless, horrific event, in Colorado Springs: A certain Colorado member of the House--who is wildly pro firearms, given to spreading hate toward LGBTQ people, and oblivious about public safety and her own odiousness--was silent until noon. Then it dawned on her that perhaps she should respond, so she tweeted some classically vapid and insultingly useless "thoughts and prayers." And... then the entire Twitter-sphere and internet came down on her like a ton of bricks. Next she'll probably whine that she's being cancelled.

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TCinLA's avatar

When it comes to that miniature professional juvenile delinquent, "If my thought dreams could be seen, they'd probably put my head in a guillotine."

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David Levine's avatar

well, "they" wouldn't include most of US.

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Suzanne Crockett's avatar

If only Colorado voters HAD canceled her. 🤦‍♀️

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Gail Adams VA/FL's avatar

I lived in Colorado Springs, late '70's, Interned with legal aid. I loved it. What happened?

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TCinLA's avatar

It became the capitol of the religious far right. James Dobson Focus on the Family, the rest of the homophibic "christians". It's why the Air Force Academy is one Fundamentalist scandal after another since that fake minister who ran the Vineyard church there in the 80s and 90s.

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David Levine's avatar

that's too bad...it felt like a really nice, civilized place to live in 1965.

but, as Sam Goldwyn is reputed to have said, "we've passed a lot of water since then."

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TCinLA's avatar

My grandparents lived there and I used to love to go visit in the 50s. Go out to Maniou Springs for the mineral water, go have a picnic in the Garden of the Gods, ride the cog railroad once to the top of Pike's Peak.

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David Levine's avatar

don't even get me started on that Vineyard thing. I suppose it's nice to be reminded that the very rich and famous can be asshole lemmings as much as the rest of us, but we already knew that and that guy went WAY TOO FAR, even for one of those greedy evangelical assholes.

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MaryPat's avatar

Oh.

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Karen RN's avatar

I contributed regularly to Adam Frisch’s campaign. I had such high hopes of him beating the gun packing boobert. 😿

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Gail Adams VA/FL's avatar

Am I correct that even with his concession it’s not final? Automatic recount underway?

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Bongo-1, VT's avatar

Why do the good die and the worthless live?

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TCinLA's avatar

A question I ask often.

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LouAnn N.Y/ MA./ FL.'s avatar

I keep saying, to myself, "God has His plan"!!

🙂🙃

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David Levine's avatar

it's kind of question #1 when you start to consider the appropriateness of Abrahamic religions for explaining and/or dealing with everyday phenomenal reality in this particular universe.

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Fred WI's avatar

I had a long argument with myself about this exactly. Now, the voice in my head is pissed off. I fear I will now be alone, for I know not which of us died. Hello?

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Nov 21, 2022
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TCinLA's avatar

That's gotta leave a mark for sure.

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Suzanne Crockett's avatar

I can sympathize - I live in Florida.

“Disgraceful imbecile…” I’m stealing that!

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Elizabeth M. (Massachusetts)'s avatar

I’m so sorry. I hope that over the next two years a resounding majority of Colorado voters comes to see that Boebert is a completely unqualified disgrace to your fair state, and that they all vote next time.

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Nov 21, 2022
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Elizabeth M. (Massachusetts)'s avatar

Clearly, since she won by such a tiny margin. One wonders if there are over 500 people who deplore her, who just didn't make it to the polls. How did the Dems and grassroots organizations do on Get Out The Vote in Colorado. Did they seem to be plenty active?

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Laurie's avatar

Me too.

Needed this.

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FERN MCBRIDE (NYC)'s avatar

For as long as it lasted, I didn't stop laughing. Couldn't believe it possible, but you delivered. Thanks to you, TC, and your 'old' pilot friend.

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Stephanie H's avatar

As Dixie Carter once said: where I grew up we didn't ask if there were crazy people in your family, we asked whose side the crazy people were on. Pretty much.

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GarySanDiego's avatar

I swear there’s a few Rodney Dangerfield lines in there! 🤣

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TCinLA's avatar

I'm sure there are.

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Maggie's avatar

Finally - I have WISDOM highlights! Makes me feel so much better.

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Camilla B. (GA)'s avatar

Maggie, that one and being bid on at the antique show are my favorites. 😂😂

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JDinTX's avatar

Love these, yes, I ONCE tried to give a cat a bath, no excuse, cats can do this, no help needed.

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David Levine's avatar

I laughed a lot more frequently than I thought I would. and I'm definitely going to use several. and not nearly as many groaners as you foretold. but let's remember that any joke about edging is one I'm sure to seize on.

we all know, however, that the shopping joke has been tampered with. it's "stoned and shopping" and we all know there's a difference, even if it's not quite as much as it seems. obviously, either one is a big mistake. the nature of the foods bought is also different.

based on what I just typed, the one closest to my heart is "Excuse me while I overthink this." in fact, if you translate it into Latin (which I could have done, once upon a time) and stick it on a shield with, say, a dog's head, that could be my coat of arms. and let's remember that Shakespeare busted his ass for a coat of arms.

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TCinLA's avatar

That was the one that also got me.

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Maggie's avatar

They have T-shirts with that one - easier than translating & putting it on a shield!!

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Bongo-1, VT's avatar

These just remind me how aging is a bitch even with all the bionic replacements. Enjoyed the laugh.

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Judy Clay's avatar

The only good cranberry sauce is the one with rings around it.

If jumping to conclusions was an Olympic event New be a old medal winner

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Suzanne Crockett's avatar

“turning down the car stereo to see better.” 😄😆🤭😆😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

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T L Mills's avatar

Hey, I've actually done that. Even worse, the radio was on NPR. I must be a fossil!

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Judith Swink (CA)'s avatar

I have too when navigating unfamiliar streets!

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Penfist's avatar

“I don’t have grey hair.  I have wisdom highlights.” Mine has turned white except on the very top.

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