WORLD'S GREATEST DEALMAKER SAVES THE DAY

Paul Krugman wrote in his Monday morning Substack post: “It would be funny if it weren’t so serious. Actually it is funny if you’re into gallows humor. Trump spent the entire campaign proclaiming that he was a Tariff Man, promising high tariffs and asserting that we were somehow subsidizing Canada and Mexico. Yet businesses and bank analysts blithely assumed that he didn’t really mean it. On Inauguration Day he made a very specific promise: 25 percent tariffs on Canada and Mexico by Feb. 1. Yet the newsletter I receive from Goldman Sachs summarized the day with the headline “A More Benign Tone on Tariffs,” and declared: “Despite Trump’s comments, we continue to believe the odds of a 25% tariff on Canada and Mexico are low (20%).” Jamie Dimon told everyone to calm down about Trump’s tariffs: “If it’s a little inflationary but it’s good for national security, so be it. I mean, get over it.”

The White House occupier used the fentanyl crisis as a major justification for the tariffs. FACT CHECK: The fentanyl epidemic was already declining even before he took office, and in the case of Canada specifically, very little of the illegal drug trade occurs at the country's U.S. border.

In good news, Ontario Premier Doug Ford not only canceled the province’s contract with Starlink but has banned Elmo and his companies from doing business with the Ontario provincial government permanently. In response to this, the world’s richest Ketamine drug addict posted on his Xiter (that’s pronounced “shitter”) account, “Oh well.”

The World’s Greatest Business Negotiator has already shot himself in the foot with his agreement with Mexican president Claudia Sheinbaum announced this morning in which she promised to “surge” 10,000 troops to the border to halt illiegal border crossings. Marcy Wheeler at Empty Wheel pointed out: "Surging 10,000 troops to the border is something Biden got them to do in the past w/o tanking the stock market. Given that @Claudiashein got concessions by giving Trump what Mexico has already given the US, I gotta wonder whether Trump's tantrum was just about shorting the stock market."

Washington Post columnist Catherine Rampell pointed out: "It seems like the trick to negotiating with Trump is to realize he doesn’t have any idea what the current facts are. (You don’t say) 'Oh you want 10,000 troops?' says world leader who already deployed 15,000. 'Great 10,000 it is.'" FACT CHECK: "Mexico has made similar agreements without the threat of tariffs," posted Sam Stein, of The Bulwark and MSNBC. "Here in 2021 they agreed to surge the same number of troops to help with migration. Here in 2022 they agreed to invest an additional $1.5b. Here in 2023 were 15 administrative actions."

When everyone knows you are The Dumbest Ignoramus on the Planet, it sorta undercuts your deal making.

As witness the news that has just broken that Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has announced that Un-President Dilbert J. Dumbass has agreed not to impose tariffs on his country for at least a month. What did Trudeau have to promise? Wait for it... drumroll... he promised to send 10,000 troops to the border! Just like Mexico!! Who’d a thunkit possible?? "Canada is implementing our $1.3 billion border plan - reinforcing the border with new choppers, technology and personnel, enhanced coordination with our American partners, and increased resources to stop the flow of fentanyl. Nearly 10,000 frontline personnel are and will be working on protecting the border. In addition, Canada is making new commitments to appoint a Fentanyl Czar, we will list cartels as terrorists, ensure 24/7 eyes on the border, launch a Canada- U.S. Joint Strike Force to combat organized crime, fentanyl and money laundering. I have also signed a new intelligence directive on organized crime and fentanyl and we will be backing it with $200 million."

Trump got outsmarted again, as many of the promises were already announced last year. Critics on social media laughed as news broke that President Donald Trump paused plans to levy severe tariffs on Canada. FACT CHECK: Just like with Mexico, this agreement was previously in the works by the Biden Administration. "Trump got played again. Canada *already* has 8,500 frontline personnel at the border," wrote former MSNBC host Mehdi Hasan. "We also announced the $1.3 billion in December. lol," replied Canadian journalist Jordan Heath-Rawlings. "LOL Canada gave our felonious, imbecilic president ice in winter and he took it," chided conservative attorney George Conway,

Even with this, Dilbert has now demonstrated to Congress - with the tariffs and the Everybody’s Favorite Unreconstructed Afrkaner Drug Addict being allowed to run wild in government agencies with his Children’s Brigade, that he cannot be trusted any further than they can see him with their eyes closed.

Senator Ron Johnson of all people said Dilbert’s tariff war is too much, comparing the decision to Great Depression-era trade policy and warning: “I don’t believe that is productive. It is going to hurt American companies, American exporters, it will hurt American consumers long term.” in an appearance on far-right news outlet NewsMax this morning. When you lose Ron...

Dilbert was asked if the reaction of the stock market had any bearing on his decision to drop the idea of tariffs on Mexico. (And now Canada) He said “No, 'I don't look at the market. What was it doing?” FACT CHECK We know, obviously, based on watching him for a very long time, that is not true.

The Dow Jones, NASDAQ, and S&P 500 all opened down on Monday, and continued to plummet following Dilbert’s weekend announcement about trade tariffs he imposed on the two countries and China. ABC News reported, "The Dow Jones Industrial Average slid about 150 points, or 0.35%, in early trading on Monday. The S&P 500 dropped 0.7%, and the tech-heavy Nasdaq ticked down 1%."

If Democrats allowed the vote on raising the debt limit to fail next month, thus putting all blame for the possible economic destruction of the country squarely on Republicans, they could make the second vote into a hammer to end Dilbert’sReign of Error.

The hits just keep a comin’. Keeping up with the insanity is getting to the point it needs 24/7effort. You can help this happen as a paid subscriber to support the work. It’s only $7/month or $70/year.

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