QEVIN'S REALLY QUIVERIN' - UPDATED

Realizing that there was a strong likelihood he did not have even a majority of the House Republican votes to obtain House approval of an impeachment investigation of President Biden, Quiverin’ Qevin - facing the termination of his Speaker-In-Name-Only reign by the Unreconstructed Confederate Traitors of the Fwee-Dumbass Kawkuss - today announced his unilateral decision to direct the Judiciary and Government Operations committees led by Jungle Gym Jordan and James “Hit Her Again Harder” Comer to begin investigating the president to find out if there is a “there, there” - something they haven’t found despite relentless searches that can be manufactured into a Presidential Impeachment.

The Quiverin’ one is deathly afraid of being yelled at by the Traitor Trump for not finding a way to “even the score” against The Enemy; the only twice-impeached president in history, the man with 91 felony charges filed against him in two federal and two state indictments, doesn’t want to be the only one covered with mud running next year.

In the 234 years since the Constitution became the law of the land and the organizing tool of American government, there has never been a presidential impeachment process that was started because the Speaker of the House feared for his job.

Fraternity Freddie, er, I mean Florida Gator Bait Otherwise-Unemployable Matt Gaetz rose on the House floor today "to serve notice, Mr. Speaker, that you are out of compliance with the agreement that allowed you to assume this role" (the Speakership). Back during the 15 votes over two weeks it took this spineless Oklafornian moron to win the votes of the Unreconstructed Confederate Traitors, Quiverin’ Qevin was forced to agree to their demand that a single House Republican could force a vote on the Speaker-In-Name-Only’s continuing occupation of the office. Gaetz then noted that the spirit, if not the letter, of that agreement required the Quiverin’ one to welch on the deal he made with the president last spring to extend the debt limit.

A moral coward, a confirmed liar, welches on an agreement. How Republican of him!

While McQarthy has yet to comply with those demands, he is poised to demand massive cuts to the spending authorized in the debt limit deal he publicly agreed to a whole 90 days ago. Scrambling to keep Fraternity Freddie from going off fully cocked rather than his usual state of being half-cocked, Quiverin’ Qevin’s action today can be seen as the complete surrender of a worthless piece of shit whose backbone is a single strand of overcooked angel hair pasta.

The Speaker-In-Name-Only has weighed the threat of the Unreconstructed Confederate Traitors against that which might come from the Slightly Moderate On Things That Don’t Affect Them Personally Caucus and has concluded the Right is the threat. In a way, that is the ultimate put-down of the so-called “moderates,” the “traditional Republicans,” who are now completely recognized as having no power whatsoever.

And all of this is the Trump Party in action, doing whatever it takes at whatever cost to any claim of personal integrity by any of these Failures As Human Beings, in the service of Trump. During their summer vacation, their Maximum Leader made it clear to the minions that he does not want to be the only Impeached President running for re-election in 2024.

This is what Bannon means when he advocates “flooding the zone with shit.”

And the only one who is going to lose everything in this whole sorry circus is Quiverin’ Qevin, who is now guaranteed to go down in history for the next 235 years of history as the weakest Speaker of the House ever, a faithless, feckless, political cheat who can’t even do the one thing that is the saving grace of even the worst politician: keep his word. To anybody.

“Termination... with extreme prejudice...” for all these treasonous excuses for human beings. Particularly the shittiest excuse for a human being, the worthless piece of shit who has Qevin’s balls in the pocket of his ill-fitting off-the-rack blue suit.

God I hate these scummy traitors with the power of 10 million suns!

UPDATE: Qevin may have fucked himself:

During the Trump presidency, the DOJ issued a legally binding opinion that any impeachment that is not authorized by the House is invalid.

According to the opinion written in 2020 by the DOJ Office Of Legal Counsel:

[W]e conclude that the House must expressly authorize a committee to conduct an impeachment investigation and to use compulsory process in that investigation before the committee may compel the production of documents or testimony,

The House had not authorized such an investigation in connection with the impeachment-related subpoenas issued before October 31, 2019, and the subpoenas therefore had no compulsory effect.

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