POKING AROUND ON DAY 44

There are 607 days till the mid terms and a week until the GOP drives the government off the cliff (you know those incompetent morons will do it).

From the Department of Funny I Didn’t See Anyone Censure MTG or Boobert: The House floor devolved into chaos Thursday after Republicans, joined by 10 Vichy Democrat Traitors, voted to censure Rep. Al Green for disrupting President Donald Trump’s Tuesday night speech. Green and other Democrats huddled together on the House floor and sang “We Shall Overcome,” drowning out Speaker Mike Johnson as he read the censure resolution. Then the shouting began. Democrats yelled at Republicans and, in particular, at Marjorie Traitor Goon, for violating House rules and creating a double standard. She wore a MAGA cap in the chamber, which is a violation of House rules. The House voted 224-198 to censure Green, a rare formal rebuke that falls just one step short of expulsion.

From the Department of Krasnov Keeps Losing: In the courts, a judge barred Maladministration II from slashing National Institutes of Health (NIH) research funding. The judge stated, “it is likely Plaintiffs will succeed on the merits, rendering the [NIH] notice unlawful.” Massachusetts AG Andrea Joy Campbell called it “a major win for research institutions across the country.” In a new filing, lawyers challenging DOGE’s authority cited Krasnov’s joint session statement that Musk is in charge of the entity. This directly contradicts previous White House claims that “Mr. Musk is not the U.S. DOGE Service Administrator,” and will likely bolster the case for federal workers. The National Endowment for Democracy filed a lawsuit against Maladministration II for withholding $239 million from the organization. They are currently managing 1,000 projects in 100 countries around the world, aimed at promoting democracy.

From the Department of It’s Time To Let This Federal Employee Know What You Think. According to a source, Elmo has been assigned the email address: erm71@who.eop.gov - the email address reflects his attachment to the White House Office, the Executive Office of the President, and, apparently, Musk’s full initials plus his birth year, 1971. This differs from the standard format for EOP emails, which typically include the staffer’s full first and last name. TAFM strongly suggests you be short and to the point, since he’s a busy busy boy. Strive for clarity.

From the Department of The Missouri Hillbilly Is Out Of Control: Former president of the Eagle Forum Education & Legal Defense Fund Ed Martin is threatening Georgetown Law School with criminal investigation and blackballing students unless the university ends all DEI efforts. Martin’s threats against the Jesuit university came in a letter to the law school dean dated last month but apparently misaddressed and re-sent this week. “At this time, you should know that no applicant for our fellows program, our summer internship, or employment in our office who is a student or affiliated with a law school or university that continues to teach and utilize DEI will be considered,” Martin wrote. This is what happens when you put an inbred Southern moron of little intelligence and less achievement in a position of authority where he can exercise his over-inflated opinion of himself.

From the Department of Elmo Delenda Est!: U.S. Marshals have warned federal judges of unusually high threat levels as Elmo and other Maladministration II allies ramp up efforts to discredit judges who stand in the way of White House efforts to slash federal jobs and programs, said several judges with knowledge of the warnings. In recent weeks, Elmo, congressional Republicans and other top allies of Krasnov have called for the impeachment of some federal judges or attacked their integrity in response to court rulings that have slowed Maladministration II's moves to dismantle entire government agencies and fire tens of thousands of workers. Elmo has lambasted judges in more than 30 posts since the end of January on his social media site X, calling them “corrupt,” “radical,” “evil” and deriding the "TYRANNY of the JUDICIARY" after judges blocked parts of the federal downsizing that he’s led. ''The only way to restore rule of the people in America is to impeach judges. No one is above the law, including judges.” The American Bar Association issued a statement on Monday denouncing the ongoing wave of verbal assaults and threats against judges. The Federal Judges Association said in a statement to its 1,100 members late on Tuesday that “continued violence, intimidation and defiance directed at judges simply because they are fulfilling their sworn judicial duties” risked “the collapse of the rule of law.”

From the Department of There Are Many Ways For Krasnov To Fuck Ukraine: Four senior members of Krasnov’s entourage have held secret discussions with some of Kyiv’s top political opponents to Volodymyr Zelenskyy, just as Washington aligns with Moscow in seeking to lever the Ukrainian president out of his job. The senior Krasnov allies held talks with Ukrainian opposition leader Yulia Tymoshenko, a remorselessly ambitious former prime minister, and senior members of the party of Petro Poroshenko, Zelenskyy’s immediate predecessor as president, according to three Ukrainian parliamentarians and a U.S. Republican foreign policy expert. The discussions centered on whether Ukraine could hold quick presidential elections. These are being delayed in line with the country’s constitution because Ukraine remains under martial law. Critics of holding elections say they could be chaotic and play into Russia’s hands, with so many potential voters serving on the front lines or living abroad as refugees. Tulsi Gabbard has falsely accused Kyiv of canceling the election. The official line from Maladministration II is that Krasnov is not interfering in Ukraine’s domestic politics. This week, Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick denied his boss was “weighing into Ukrainian politics,” adding all that Krasnov wants is “a partner for peace.” Additionally, Maladministration II is planning to revoke temporary legal status for some 240,000 Ukrainians who fled the conflict, a senior official and three sources familiar with the matter said, potentially putting them on a fast-track to deportation. The move, expected as soon as April, would be a stunning reversal of the welcome Ukrainians received under President Biden.

Here’s the good news for today - there’s quite a bit:

From the Department of: Krasnov Backs Down Again: The White House pulled the expected signing of the executive order to dismantle the Department of Education this morning. A draft of the executive order called on Education Secretary Linda McMahon to facilitate a department closure by taking all necessary steps "permitted by law,” (Pro Tip: there are none). Karoline The Presidential Fluffer said it was “fake news” that Krasnov had planned to sign the EO today. Behind the scenes, there was concern among top administration officials about the blowback the order would receive and the lack of messaging in place ahead of the rollout. Specially, how the administration would answer questions about how the executive order would impact the school lunch program along with other programs that could no longer exist. An order to dismantle the Department of Education would require congressional approval; any proposed legislation would likely fail without 60 Senate votes. Whattaya know, even Krasnov understands the theory of political gravity.

From the Department of Professional Incels Freaking Out: After conservative Justice Amy Coney Barrett joined the Supreme Court’s March 5 majority decision to uphold a lower court order requiring Maladministration II to pay USAID contractors for work already completed, right-wing influencers lashed out, calling Barrett a “DEI judge” who was “chosen solely because she checked identity politics boxes” and claiming “the power has gone to her head.” Several of the more “modern” misogynist incels noted she’s a woman who adopted Black kids. Mike Cernovich wrote that Barrett “is evil, chosen solely because she checked identity politics boxes. Another DEI hire.” Fox host Mark Levin - who’s busy 24/7/365 fighting the ancient anti-Semitic slur that all Jews are really smart - lamented that “Barrett deceived people into thinking she was a reliable constitutionalist. The power has gone to her head.”

From the Department of This Is How You Do It: Two of Elmo’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Nazis and professional Nazi (really!) Pete Marocco were blocked Wednesday afternoon from entering the U.S. African Development Foundation (USADF) headquarters in downtown Washington. The standoff, which lasted about an hour, is one of the latest acts of resistance from federal employees as DOGE scum attempt to access data systems and federal grants. The group arrived around 11:30am and attempted to gain entry to fire employees. About 30 employees were inside the USADF building at the time. A security officer at the front desk called to inform them there were two “very young men” with backpacks in the building who claimed they were USADF staff and needed access to the building, but they did not have key cards. The officer asked the employees whether he should let the visitors upstairs. Staff said no, saying the security guard’s description sounded like the same DOGE workers who had shown up at their building before. Employees say they were also aware of a letter that USADF President and CEO Ward Brehm, who was not in the office at the time, sent to a DOGE official the previous day that stated, “In my absence, I have specifically instructed the staff of USADF to adhere to our rules and procedure of not allowing any meetings of this type without my presence.” The security guard called back and said the young men were threatening to call the U.S. marshals, and his boss had given him permission to let the men upstairs. But when they reached the USADF’s floor, the DOGE employees could not find anyone to let them inside the suite. The official said employees remained at their desks and continued to work while the DOGE staffers wandered the halls. The DOGE officials left around 12:30 p.m. but threatened to return Thursday, this time with the U.S. marshals on their side. USADF is an independent agency established through the African Development Foundation Act of 1980 with a mission to support and invest directly in African-owned and African-led enterprises that improve the lives and livelihoods of people in underserved communities in Africa. A USADF official said the agency is not required to take orders from Marocco: “It’s explicit in the statute that the agency can only be dissolved by an act of Congress and the president can only be hired and fired by the board.”

From the Department of Fuck Around And Find Out: Some U.S. allies are considering scaling back the intelligence they share with Washington in response to Maladministration II’s sellout to Russia. Members of the Five Eyes, plus Israeli and Saudi Arabian intelligence agancies are concerned about Krasnov giving information on foreign assets to the Russians, as he did in the Oval Office in a 2017 meeting in which he brought Sergei Lavrov in the office and bragged about things he was too fucking stupid to know to keep his damn moron mouth shut. These agencies are already holding meetings to determine what intelligence they will no longer share with the United States. Officially, Britain, Canada and Israel are standing on their long term relationships with US intelligence agencies and saying nothing in public. Fuck around and find out, Krasnov. Maybe we’ll get lucky and the next terror attack we aren’t warned about will take out Motel-A-Lardo, with you there.

From the Department of This Is What Happens When You Stab Allies In The Back: A security conference was held in the UK this week, in which “The reception President Zelenskyy received today from his European hosts was a world away from the treatment he got in the White House not even a week ago.” Not only are the 27 leaders trying to meet Ukraine’s needs right now, but seeing that the U.S. is no longer a dependable partner, they’re looking to massively upgrade Europe’s defense industry. A spokesman said, “Public spending limits are being abandoned, loans of hundreds of billions of euros are being talked about and strict rules on borrowing could be thrown out the window.” Russia is warning against the EU or NATO sending troops to Ukraine, saying they will see this as war against Russia. The Kremlin itself said the US policy shift “largely aligns” with Russia’s interests. Russia now sees the U.S. as aligned with it and China against the west, referencing “the triangle of Russia, China and the US,” dismissing “Europe, as far as Moscow is concerned, is no longer a major force.” Doesn’t that make you feel just great as an American?

From the Department of Here’s A Big Defeat For Krasnov: Democratic Attorneys General just notched a big win this morning in their suit against OMB. Federal judge John McConnell ruled that Krasnov can’t use the Office of Management and Budget to freeze federal funds. He issued a federal injunction banning Maladministration II from using an OMB directive to freeze federal funds, writing: “The Executive’s categorical freeze of appropriated and obligated funds fundamentally undermines the distinct constitutional roles of each branch of our government. The interaction of the three co-equal branches of government is an intricate, delicate, and sophisticated balance—but it is crucial to our form of constitutional governance. Here, the Executive put itself above Congress. It imposed a categorical mandate on the spending of congressionally appropriated and obligated funds without regard to Congress’s authority to control spending. Federal agencies and departments can spend, award, or suspend money based only on the power Congress has given to them–they have no other spending power. The Executive has not pointed to any constitutional or statutory authority that would allow them to impose this type of categorical freeze... consistent with the Constitution, statutes, and case law, the Court is simply holding that the Executive’s discretion to impose its own policy preferences on appropriated funds can be exercised only if it is authorized by the congressionally approved appropriations statutes. Accordingly, based on these principles... the Court grants the States’ Motion for Preliminary Injunction.” This is big, folks. A smack in the face t o Elmo the Un-Magnificent.

From the Department of Here’s How We Do It: Yesterday, a 40-day boycott of Target was launched, following their disastrous decision to end all diversity policies and programs. Rev. Jamal Bryant, the pastor who started the boycott, said: “We’re asking people to divest from Target because they have turned their back on our community.” Tomorrow, there are Stand Up For Science rallies planned in at least 31 cities across America—to fight back against Trump’s sweeping cuts to scientific research. On Saturday, there are hundreds of rallies and events scheduled all across the world to celebrate International Women’s Day. Here in Los Angeles, there will be anti-Elmo demonstrations at all Swasticar dealerships in the southland; Yours Truly will be found at the North Hollywood Swasticar Dealership demonstration. Lin-Manuel Miranda announced the cancellation of beloved musical Hamilton at the Kennedy Center next year—due to Trump’s takeover of the arts hub.Appearing on Colbert Tuesday, Pete Buttigieg ended the interview by reminding folks what Sen. Slotkin said in her response to Trump’s joint session rant: “You’ve gotta be engaged. You’ve gotta hold elected officials accountable, like what’s going on at these town halls. And you gotta organize.” Words. To. Live. By.

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