POKING AROUND ON DAY 17

It’s only taken 16 days for the two most common words to come out of my mouth are Holy Fucking Shit! Yeah, that’s three words but the middle one’s just an exclamation. We are now in a place and time that is unimaginable, even to someone who paid attention to everything the enemy said. I remember reading that Charles DeGaulle - one of the few French military leaders who had a clue about what was coming in 1940 - was known to use the French “Nom de dieu de merde!” during that fight, which according to the dictionary is “often used in moments of extreme anger or shock.”

Yeah. Extreme anger at what is happening, and shock that it’s happening as it is. All I know is my informed imagination couldn’t have come up with what can be seen everywhere in all reports now, because I wouldn’t have believed it possible in any circumstances. But that’s what happens in revolutions.

Yes, the right word is Revolution. In this case, a Counter-Revolution, dedicated to the destruction of modern reality. What the first 16 days of Maladministration II have shown is that the coup attempt on January 6, 2021 has never stopped.

And remember, there are 636 days till the midterms. Don’t listen to the “geniuses” who know “they” won’t allow the election to happen. Plan for it until we can’t. Live to win.

On that happy note, I will poke the walking stick into these piles of shit, to assure myself of how shitty they are:

From the Department of You Gotta Be Shittin’ Me!: At his news conference today with Nitwityahoo, Dilbert proclaimed that the United States will take over Gaza, and use the land to generate jobs and housing. "The U.S. will take over the Gaza strip and be responsible for dismantling all of the dangerous, unexploded bombs and other weapons on the site. We will create an economic development that will supply unlimited numbers of jobs and housing for the people of the area." Asked if the US would send troops, he replied, “If it’s necessary, we’ll do that. We’re going to take over that piece, and we’re going to develop it. I do see a long-term ownership position, and I see it bringing great stability to that part of the Middle East. We’re going to take over that piece, and we’re going to develop it. I do see a long-term ownership position, and I see it bringing great stability to that part of the Middle East.” Dilbert was asked if Saudi Arabia was opposed to this idea; he replied, “No.” TWO MINUTES LATER the Saudi Foreign Minstry posted: "His Royal Highness Prince Mohammed bin Salman bin Abdulaziz Al Saud, Crown Prince and Prime Minister clearly and unequivocally reaffirmed this stance during his speech at the opening of the first session of the ninth term of the Shura Council on September 18, 2024. His Royal Highness emphasised that Saudi Arabia will continue its relentless efforts to establish an independent Palestinian state with East Jerusalem as its capital, and will not establish diplomatic relations with Israel without that.” Dilbert - you are too fucking STUPID to qualify as a Homo Sapiens. But the world knows you are Homo Sap. Holy. Fucking. Shit. “Nom de dieu de merde!” The mind, it boggles.

From the Department of You Do What You Can When You Don’t Hold the Majority: Dilbert was going to announce he w as giving Nitwityahoo $1 billion in military aid, which includes 4,700 1,000-pound bombs, worth more than $700 million, as well as armored bulldozers, worth more than $300 million. But wonder of wonders! Congress put a hold on the deal! The four top lawmakers on the House Foreign Affairs Committee and the Senate Foreign Relations Committee have the individual power to block arms sales orders when they are over a certain dollar amount. We can bet it was neither of the two Republicans. Finally, Democrats are starting to see what resistance looks like? Did some of them download that 1944 CIA manual, “Simple Sabotage”? The manual’s first rule: “Refer back to regulations at every opportunity.”

From the Department of God Damn this Motherfucker All to Hell: Alleged SecDef Pete Hegseth crawled out of his bottle today long enough to announce that the first flights of migrants to Guantanamo Bay started today. Dilbert’s executive order allows for up to 30,000 to be housed there while their deportation cases are litigated. Wow. Our own Dachau. Already in operation. It took Hitler a year. “Nom de dieu de merde!”

From the Department of He Is Even More Depraved Than You Can Possibly Imagine: Dilbert said he wants other countries to start housing our prison inmates. President Nayib Bukele of El Salvador said he will accept the offer: "We have offered the US the opportunity to outsource part of its prison system. We are willing to take in convicted criminals (including convicted US citizens) into our mega-prison (CECOT) in exchange for a fee. The fee would be relatively low for the US but significant for us, making our entire prison system sustainable." It has been settled law in the US for over 200 years that it is illegal for our inmates to be sent to a foreign prison. Human rights groups have called for CECOT to be closed because of mistreatment of inmates. Immigration Law expert Aaron Reichlin-Melnick: “Okay, but that's not a thing. I don't care what Bukele says, the US cannot legally banish Americans - such authorities died centuries ago and are the relic of a time of terra nullius. It just is not legal under any modern international laws either.” “Nom de dieu de merde!”

From the Department of Dilbert Jr Is A Total Fuckhead But You Knew That: Italian Green Party politician Andrea Zanoni has filed a complaint in court in Italy, accusing Dilbert Jr. of illegally killing an endangered Ruddy Shelduck bird near Venice, Italy during a recent hunting trip. Local environmentalists and Italian MPs have joined the formal complaint and called for an investigation. Dilbert Jr. was seen in a video posted by Field Ethos, of which he is part-owner, posing in camo with several dead ducks he’d just killed, including one amber colored duck that jis an endangered Ruddy Shelduck. Dilbert Jr. says on the video while pointing at it: “I'm not even sure what it is.” It is illegal in Italy to kill a Ruddy Shelduck. Ready. Fire. Aim!

From the Department of Fuck You Dumbfucks Who Voted For Dilbert Because of The Price of Eggs: Waffle House announced a $0.50 surcharge on every egg they sell in response to the soaring cost of eggs under Maladministration II: "Consumers and restaurants are being forced to make difficult decisions. While we hope these price fluctuations will be short-lived, we cannot predict how long this shortage will last."

From the Department of Fuck Elmo Right In His Face: Newly minted “special government employee” Elmo and his Children’s Crusaders are sending shockwaves through the government. A former senior official who worked at the Defense Department through the end of the Biden Administration last month said they were in touch with former colleagues, and morale is low at the Pentagon. “They are going to lose a lot of people who have been there a long time and that’s the continuity that helps us transition. That’s the expertise you need. When you only have yes men, it’s dangerous. There’s not even really a check on the system. It’s scary. It’s totally scary.” Elmo responded in a DOGE audio chat he hosted on X late Sunday, “DOGE will win if millions of people support it in ways that I wouldn’t even know how they supported it, but just that you did,. Thank you to the unknown soldier.” He also said, “Let me just say, the more I’ve got to know President Trump, the more I like him. Frankly, I love the guy. He’s great. This is our shot. This is the best hand of cards we’re ever going to have.” Can you say “counter-revolution”? I knew you could. As one legal observer wrote:“I think a colorable, non-frivolous argument can be made that Elon Musk, and everyone on his DOGE team accessing the federal government’s computer infrastructure, is potentially personally liable for violating the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act (CFAA).” With the criminals running the government, charging Elmo and arresting him on such a charge is... unlikely.

From the Department of The Surrenders Continue: Dilbert is going to attend the Super Bowl in New Orleans this weekend. In preparation for his arrival, the NFL will modify the statements in the end zones. “End Racism” will be changed to “Choose Love.” Thank god I haven’t watched any fucking football game in 40+ years. America’s Roman Coliseum.

From the Department of Senator Fettermanchin Strikes Again: Last night, the Senate Judiciary Committee voted to confirm Pam Bondi as Attorney General in charge of the Department of Injustice. The vote was “largely” along party lines, with all Republicans voting in favor, and all but one Democrat voting “no.” Who was the Democratic “Yes” vote to install the Bitch of Belsen as defender of our liberties? Wait for it... drumroll... It was Senator Fettermanchin! I’m sooooo surprised! Fucking worthless piece of shit. And if that wasn’t enough complete bullshit, this morning the sonofabitch stated he’s in support of Dilbert’s batshit-insane “Gaza plan” to make the US reviled throughout the entire freakin’ world. “Palestinians for years have refused or have been unwilling to deliver a government that provided security and economic development for themselves.” Manchinema were bad, but I don’t recall them ever advocating support for massive war crimes, which is what this is. Fuck. Him. In. His. Damned. Face!

From the Department of Put The Fox In Charge Of The Henhouse: The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau was ordered yesterday to cease work. It is a congressionally-created agency that Dilbert cannot terminate. He then appointed Treasury Secretary Bessent as the new CFPB head and he immediately ordered the CFPB to cease work. Treasury Secretary Bessent is a hedge fund manager and no friend to consumers. Unsurprisingly, major banks cheered Bessent’s appointment and urged the immediate repeal of pesky regulations protecting the industry’s customers from unscrupulous practices. The Fox is in the henhouse, and he’s the one with the badge. “Nom de dieu de merde!”

Something to kp in mind: You are not the crazy one. You are in fact living through a coup. If you feel stressed out, that’s because you’re living through a coup and you’re a normal human being with a heart and a brain. Don’t forget that the people doing this are stupid fucking ignoramus dumbasses and lifetime losers who have sex with inflatable dolls and couches.

A closing thought; “When resistance calls, answer with everything you have.” (H/t Gloria Horton-Young)

The OSS Simple Sabotage Field Manual is real. Declassified in 2008, it was created by the Office of Strategic Services in 1944, designed to help ordinary citizens disrupt enemy operations - not with weapons, but with sheer, unrelenting bureaucratic inefficiency. As Gloria says, “It remains one of the most delightfully passive-aggressive historical documents ever produced.” You can download it from the CIA here: https://substack.com/redirect/8f0548fa-22f1-4756-8ad0-3ad1527e2250?j=eyJ1IjoiMzY3bjQifQ.B8iFK-__7Un9BoxrMBvV5ghbtyKQLOMbGKQ8SV1RJU0

The shit is seriously ”gettin’ real,” and it’s a 24/7 job to keep up with it and keep you informed about the insanity. It would really help if you could support this work as a paid subscriber. I’d appreciate that very much. It’s only $7/month or $70/year.

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