HERE'S YOUR WEEKEND NEWS

It’s day 201 of the continuous dumbfuckdery of COMINCHEAT. There are 451 days left of this, if we get our act together and stop him.

After an investigation of NY Attorney General Letitia James was announced Thursday by John A. Sarcone III, the illegally-appointed fascist cosplaying as “Special Attorney to the Department of Justice for the Northern District of New York” on Thursday, Cosplaying AG Pam Bondi added a newly-announced investigation of Senator Adam Schiff for “mortgage fraud,” and put freakshow ultra-MAGAt former acting US Attorney for DC, Ed Martin, now a Special Assistant” to Bondi to “supervise” COMINCHEAT’s harassment of his political enemies Friday morning. Let the Show Trials begin with two fascist lunatics - neither of whom has ever prosecuted a case - leading the persecution.

Edumacation Secretary Linda Mcmahon went to the national Conservative Student Conference to give an address last week. As she started extolling the magnificent achievements of an unnamed Barron Trump who became a “millionaire” during the “gap year” he took from education, which she said proved the value of getting away from education, suddenly circus music came over the speakers. McMahon continued speaking and the music got louder... and louder... and then it changed to the “Curb Your Enthusiasm” theme song. I love it.

They’re still up to the same old bullshit: Border Patrol agents clad in tactical gear jumped out of a Penske moving truck in the parking lot of a Los Angeles Home Depot, arresting more than a dozen immigrants early Wednesday morning. The raid, dubbed “Operation Trojan Horse” by U.S. Border Patrol El Centro Sector Chief Gregory Bovino, came weeks after a federal judge temporarily blocked agents from using race, spoken language or place of work to target people in indiscriminate immigration arrests. The Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals later affirmed the federal judge’s ruling. The Wednesday raid, as well as others in the Los Angeles area in recent weeks, suggest Maladministration II is not complying with court orders. Community watchdog groups have posted videos of alleged raids and arrests at Home Depots, car washes and grocery stores across LA County. Fux Snooze reporter Matt Finn, who embedded with Border Patrol during the raid, posted a video Wednesday morning from inside the Penske truck, showing at least six Border Patrol agents jumping out of the truck and running toward people in the parking lot. Finn posted on Xitter: “DHS says MS 13 has a chokehold on this area, which is one reason why they’re carrying out the highly optic immigration raids.” (FACT CHECK: This is a bullshit lie, surprise, surprise.) DHS said Border Patrol agents arrested 16 “illegal aliens from Guatemala, Mexico, Honduras, and Nicaragua,” but did not mention MS-13. It turns out at least one of the people arrested had legal immigration status. U.S. Attorney for the Central District of California Bill Essayli (now illegally occupying his office in opposition to the law regarding appointment of US Attorneys) applauded the raid the Fox video of a Border Patrol agent holding two men by the backs of their shirts. “For those who thought immigration enforcement had stopped in Southern California, think again. The enforcement of federal law is not negotiable, and there are no sanctuaries from the reach of the federal government,” he wrote on Xitter.

Speaking of cosplaying ICE goons, Dean Cain - who’s been cosplaying at everything he’s ever attempted - got some Actual Education from Margaret Cho about his announcement that the latest cosplay will be him playing an SA storm trooper for COMINCHEAT’s pogrom. Cho posted to her Instagram account with the text “Why would you join #ICE #dumb” written across it: “Why would you join ICE and encourage people to join ICE when your ancestors were interned in World War II? You’re Japanese. You’re not even white… I know you, and you are not white. You’ll never be white.” (Cain, who is Japanese on his father’s side, was born Dean Tanaka, and has insisted he has no shame about his heritage. “Tanaka is my given name, and it’s funny that people are like, ‘Well, you tried to hide that.’ It’s tattooed on my ankle,” he told Variety last week. “My family was interned in the Minidoka internment camp in Idaho. That was a horrible injustice, but I don’t think that I deserve any sort of reparations.”) Earlier this week, Stuporman posted a video on Xitter (that’s pronounced “shitter”) encouraging Americans to join ICE and help arrest “hundreds of thousands of criminals, including terrorists, rapists, murderers, pedophiles, MS-13 gang members, drug traffickers, you name it—very dangerous people.” (FACT CHECK: Data from TRAC revealed that about seven of every 10 migrants detained by ICE, as of July 27, don’t have a criminal record in the U.S.) Yhou know he did this because he *needs* the $50k.

Alleged cosplaying “U..S. Attorney for DC” and alleged “Fux Snooze on air personality” (the problem there being she hasn’t got one) Jeanine Pirro said Wednesday that the age of legal accountability in Washington, D.C., should be lowered to 14 following the recent assault of Edward “Big Balls” Coristine. Apparing on “the Ingraham Angle, Pirro got all the “facts” wrong when she said “We’ve got an intern, an intern from college, he gets shot going out for McDonald’s at 10:30 at night. This kid is trying to help his girlfriend or his friend to a car. He gets assaulted and, but for a cop going by, they would have — had they gotten him on the ground, they would have stomped him and finished him. He was able to stay standing. This has to end.” Coristine - who is not an “intern” - was beaten up by as many as 10 teens during an attempted carjacking near the White House on Sunday. Pirro supports Dearest Leader’s push to federalize the nation’s capital and argued that violent youth are “coddled” in Democrat-run cities. “Youth violence is on the rise, not just in D.C., but across the country. They need to understand that enough is enough, that we’re going to put them in jail or some kind of youth rehabilitation detention facility, and not allow the D.C. Council to take cover for these kids. Here’s the thing: D.C. is the nation’s capital. People come here for pride and patriotism, not to get assaulted, carjacked or shot, get caught in a crossfire.” She then crawled back in her Box o’ Wine.

The Chair Farce will deny early retirement benefits to transgender service members with 15 to 18 years of military service, even in cases where an early retirement was already approved, according to a new memo. Transgender service members, who were made to either voluntarily separate or be forced out of the military under a policy instituted by Maladministration II, will instead be offered enhanced voluntary separation pay, which falls short of the early retirement benefit and is typically given to service members who choose to leave active duty before they are eligible for retirement An earlier memo, sent in May by Gwendolyn R. Defilippi, acting assistant secretary of the Chair Farce for manpower and reserve affairs, said transgender service members with 15 to 18 years of service could request Temporary Early Retirement Authority (TERA). In most military branches, including the Chair Farce, service members are eligible for retirement after 20 years. A Chair Farce spokesperson told Reuters Thursday that roughly a dozen transgender troops with between 15 and 18 years of military service were “prematurely notified” that their TERA applications were approved, and a “higher level review” was required. In the Aug. 4 memo, Brian Scarlett, cosplaying as temporary assistant secretary of the Air Force for manpower and reserve affairs, wrote that, “after careful consideration of the individual applications,” he was “disapproving” TERA requests from trans service members with 15 to 18 years of service. The memo does not explain the decision. COMINCHEAT’s Jan. 27 executive order to boot transgender people from the military alleges they cannot satisfy the “rigorous standards” needed to serve, and allowing their participation threatens military readiness and unit cohesion. (FACT CHECK: A 2016 RAND Corp. study commissioned by the Pentagon found that allowing trans people to serve had no negative impact on unit cohesion, operational effectiveness or readiness.)

Thursday morning, former FBI acting director Brian Driscoll departed the FBI field office in Virginia he had been demoted to heading, after being fired for opposing COMINCHEAT. 200 FBI agents applauded him out the door, and act of direct defiance to Maladministration II. He was not the only FBI agent fired for keeping his oath to protect the country from traitors like Trump. Other officials reportedly fired, effective yesterday, included: Steven Jensen, a former assistant director whom Patel put in charge of the Washington field office in April, fired for investigating the January 6 traitors; Spencer Evans, who had already been demoted from his position running the Las Vegas field office, fired for participating in the Mueller investigation of Trump’s treason with Putin; Walter Giardina, a former Marine who worked on Trump-related investigations, including the contempt of Congress case against Peter Navarro; Christopher Meyer, who had worked on Trump treason investigations. “None of the men appeared eligible to retire,” according to the NYT, which reported that Giardina’s wife died of cancer at age 49 last month.

Alleged SECDEF and failure as a human Pete Hegseth - who supposedly took an oath as both an officer in the U.S. Army and as Secretary of Defense to “protect and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic” - has vowed not to back down from celebrating America’s “proud” Confederate history. “We recognize our history,” he told Fux Snooze host Will Cain Thursday. “We don’t erase it. We don’t follow the woke lemmings off the cliff that want to tear down statues… We’re proud of our history.” He was defending the decision to restore a Confederate monument in Arlington National Cemetery that critics say whitewashes the history of slavery in America. Hegseth made it clear that he is willing to do whatever it takes to defeat his opposition. “Our job is to ensure our enemies know exactly what we will do to them if they threaten us up to and including total war.” The monument in question is Moses Ezekiel’s Confederate Memorial, which features an inscription in Latin that describes the Civil War as a “lost cause” that was honorable for its noble principles and resistance to tyranny. The move to restore the sculpture is part of a broader push by Maladministration II to install the Second Confederacy across the government. The “administration” dedicated to “efficiency” is spending $10 million on this.

Following Wrong RFK Got Shot’s cancellation of federal funding for mRNA vaccine research, Dr. Katalin Karikó - who was awarded the Nobel Prize in 2023 for her work on mRNA vaccines - said this about Nepo Dumbfuck Jr: “If you are sick, you don’t ask your lawyer what to do. He is a lawyer who doesn’t understand these issues. You ask a physician, someone knowledgeable on the subject.” (Let’s all remember the only truthful thing Wrong RFK Got Shot ever said: “I don't think people should be taking medical advice from me.”) The “Kennedy Curse” is sure taking its time kicking in with this one.

Republicans hope to pick up as many as 12 seats through their massive vote-suppression/redistricting plot. In addition to five from Texas, they see themselves getting three in Florida, one each in Missouri and Indiana, and 2-3 in Ohio. This is all to keep Republican control of the House in the 2026 election regardless of what voters do, in order to prevent another impeachment of COMINCHEAT, particularly since the winds are now blowing against them in the Senate with the possibility Democrats could pick up as many as 18 of the 24 GOP senate seats up for re-election, giving them a “conviction majority” to remove the traitor. Trump is terrified of this happening, inasmuch as he seems incapable of getting loose of the Epstein tarbaby. Unfortunately, in a best case scenario, Democrats can’t come close to matching a flip of 12 seats, which would mean the Republicans could keep the House regardless. The deadline has passed to do this before the 2026 elections in New Jersey and Colorado. Democrats don’t have the votes to do it in Washington State. New York would require court intervention. Democrats have the possibility of a blue wave in the face of all the bad news for the GOP as their best hope,, which means GET OUT THERE AND GET TO WORK!

Leaked photos from inside Jeffrey Epstein’s NYC “Castle Dracula” (according to Woody Allen, who should know) show framed photos on the wall of Epstein at COMINCHEAT’s 2005 wedding to Melanoma, proving they were still close then. This puts the lie to Turdbrain’s tale of ending things with Epstein in 2002, once again reminding us that every word he says is a lie, including “and” and “the.”

Ghislaine Maxwell has been barred from participating in the sought-after “puppy program” at the cushy prison camp Maladministration II transferred her to. Canine Companions, which uses inmates to train puppies to become service dogs, says convicted sex traffickers like Maxwell are not allowed to participate in training. “We do not allow anyone whose crime involves abuse towards minors or animals—including any crime of a sexual nature,” CEO Paige Mazzoni told NBC News. “That’s a hard policy we have, so she will not be able to. Those are crimes against the vulnerable, and you’re putting them with a puppy who is vulnerable.” Maxwell has reportedly received a cold welcome from her fellow inmates, who are mainly serving time for financial crimes like wire fraud and tax evasion.

Speaking of tax evasion, MAGAt IRS Commissioner Billy Long was fired Riday, two months after he was confirmed as commissioner. Long will now be nominated as Ambassador to Iceland for his consolation prize. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent will serve as acting commissioner until a permanent replacement is nominted and approved.

With Kamala Harris having announced she won’t run for California governor, the nw odds-on favorite to win the Democratic nomination is Katie Porter. She’s a distinct improvement and would be an excellent governor. Too bad I won’t be a California resident in 2026 to vote for her.

With his crazy tarriffs threatened by the upcoming decision by US Court of Appeals that is about to decide whether he has the constitutional authority to impose tariffs by using “national security” argument, Dilbert Dumbfuck spewed on Lies Anti-Social: “If a Radical Left Court ruled against us at this late date, in an attempt to bring down or disturb the largest amount of money, wealth creation and influence the U.S.A. has ever seen, it would be impossible to ever recover, or pay back, these massive sums of money and honor. It would be 1929 all over again, a GREAT DEPRESSION! If they were going to rule against the wealth, strength, and power of America, they should have done so LONG AGO, at the beginning of the case, where our entire Country, while never having a chance at this kind of GREATNESS again, would not have been put in 1929 style jeopardy. There is no way America could recover from such a judicial tragedy, but I know our Court System better than anyone, there is no one in history that has gone through the trials, tribulations and uncertainties such as I, and absolutely terrible, but also amazingly beautiful, things can happen. Our Country deserves SUCCESS AND GREATNESS, NOT TURMOIL, FAILURE, AND DISGRACE. GOD BLESS AMERICA!” He. Understands. Nothing.

The chairman of Denmark's parliamentary defense committee said he regrets choosing the F-35 “Flying Swiss Army Knife” for his country, citing fears the US may threaten to cease support for the fighter. "As one of the decision-makers behind Denmark's purchase of F-35s, I regret it," Rasmus Jarlov, a member of parliament for the center-right Conservative People's Party, wrote on social media on Wednesday. Jarlov was addressing rumors that the Lockheed Martin F-35 Lightning II may have a "kill-switch" that allows Washington to remotely disable F-35s purchased by US allies. Several other US allies are reconsidering or canceling orders for the Turkey of the 21st Century, due to Trump’s BS. This means they will have airplanes that can actually fight and win in any coming war, unlike the collection of spare parts called the F-35. And all those other products of the Military-Industrial-Congressional-Complex are going to be unbought outside the U.S. Perfect!

Instant Karma’s gonna get you/gonna knock you off your feet: Roland Mehrez Beainy, a co-owner of Trump Burger in Texas, is facing deportation. Beainy, originally from Lebanon, entered the U.S. in 2019 with a non-immigrant visitor visa and overstayed, according to ICE. He was arrested by ICE on May 16 and placed in detention.

We’ll end on the news released yesterday that yet another of those whose kind we may never see again in this country has “departed the pattern.” Astronaut Jim Lovell, the man who took the photograph “Earthrise” as a crewmember on Apollo-8, the first manned spaceship to orbit the moon in 1968, and who commanded the epic mission of Apollo-13, died this past Thursday at age 97. When the first astronauts for Project Mercury were chosen, Lovell failed to be one of them due to a high bilirubin count in his blood. He wasn’t sure he would ever get another chance to become an astronaut. “I went home and was very, very much dejected,” he said in a 1999 oral history interview. In 1962, NASA recruited a second group of astronauts, and this time, Lovell passed his physical. Succeeding after things didn’t go his way at first was a theme that repeated throughout his career. He flew to space four times in Project Gemini and Apollo, and once held the record for time spent in space, at a little under 30 days. “The vast loneliness is awe-inspiring and it makes you realize just what you have back there on Earth,” Lovell famously said during the Apollo-8 Christmas Eve broadcast. James Arthur Lovell Jr. was born March 25, 1928, in Cleveland, Ohio. He was interested in rocketry, astronomy and flying, built his own model rockets, visited the Adler Planetarium and read classic science fiction books.

We still have to rattle the begging bowl. The continuing loss of paid subscribers has stabilized, but it would be hugely helpful if we could regrow the losses, and perhaps continue on. I’ll do my part and give you reasons TAFM is worth keeping, if you can do yours. “Thank you for your attention in this matter.”

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