THE ABOMINATION IN ANCHORAGE WASN’T AS BAD AS HELSINKI - IT WAS WORSE

Yeah, it was Helsinki 2018 all over again. At least he didn’t do anything in public on his knees.

If the Abomination in Anchorage proved anything, it definitely, finally, absolutely demonstrated that everything - Every. Single. Thing. - with Donald Trump is a failed Reality TV show.

The good news is, none of this is going anywhere. There is no agreement, and no likelihood of an agreement, because that wasn’t why Putin showed up to review our top secret air force Big Boy Toys at Elmensdorf AFB on Friday.

Our former European allies and former NATO partners want nothing to do with anything Velveeta Voldemort comes up with, and Ukraine’s ready to fight to the last Russian.

But it wasn’t all a strictly one-way deal. What this was, was another “Shiny Object.” All the “Senior Analysts” in the Press Corpse made the mistake of treating this as if it was actual international statecraft; when they discovered at the “press conference” that it was just a show for Putin to spout his well-remembered talking points, they declared it a “failure.”

However, contrary to what you may have heard from the Punditocracy on their TeeVee showz or read in the Nation’s Finest Fishwrap,Donald Trump achieved virtually all of his real primary objectives.

Trump’s primary short-term goal for creating and hosting this Kabuki Theater was to distract attention from the demands of the MAGA base and 86% of the rest of the American people for more information about his involvement his “best friend” and convicted sex-trafficker, Jeffrey Epstein. The secondary goal was to shift public focus from an economy that is circling the bowl as a consequence of his insane trade policies and fiscal cluelessness.

On the way to getting all that (for long enough to get a pat on the back from the World’s Dumbest Mick when he told the story of his greatest achievement ever), he again revealed himself throughout the Assholery in the Arctic as the senescent old man he is.

He veered from left to right as he walked on the carpet, unable to stay in its center, then he stood and applauded as Putin stepped smartly down his red carpet to be accorded his Great Rehabilitation when he was greeted by the president of the United States in one of the few locations on earth where he wouldn’t have already been arrested as the indicted war criminal he is.

Once together, they shook hands, then Trump waddled at Putin’s side toward a platform, looking ever-worse with each step. Above, a B-2 stealth bomber and four F-35s made a flyover that caused Putin to pause and briefly look up. Putin was then afforded an opportunity the old KGB intelligence agent must have found deeply ironic, that he was allowed to make a close inspection of four Top Secret F-22 super stealth fighters and a lineup of Flying Swiss Army Knives, er, I mean F-35s.

The world leader and his cosplaying-as-president host paused atop the platform, posed for photos, then shuffled down three steps with Trump placing his hand on Putin’s back to keep from falling in front of the crowd, and off they went to confer privately. What was clear to anyone with eyes was that Donald Trump no longer has the energy and vigor to maintain the pretense of being Da Preznit.

The declining old man from Whitey’s House was easy pickings for the trained KGB intelligence operative. Understanding Trump’s psychological and political needs completely, Putin knew what Trump wanted and slathered it on, fulfilling the role he was asked to play.

He supported the series of lies that are now crucial to both Trump’s own deluded sense of himself and to the faked public narrative about who he is. At the manufactured press conference, Putin declared that he wouldn’t have started the war in Ukraine if Trump had been in office in 2022, declared his belief that the 2020 election was rigged and stolen, and that Russia certainly had nothing whatsoever to do with the crazy Russia Russia Russia Hoax.

Watching Trump during the event, you could see his palpable satisfaction with Putin as he smiled and clapped like a little boy about to get to sit in Santa’s lap at the mall as the message sent to the innermost parts of his brain was received: Daddy approves of little Donny. The public validation of Donny’s long-standing, demonstrably false, claims was a dopamine hit that visually stimulated his responses throughout that staged performance.

Putin went on to dutifully say that Trump is a peacemaker, offering platitudes sounding like he was going along with Trump’s plan to seek an end to the war in Ukraine, though he managed to change his mark’s goal from a ceasefire to his preferred “comprehensive peace agreement” that will see Ukraine carved up and served hot at the state banquet following. To anyone who actually paid attention it was clear wasn’t agreeing to anything and that big obstacles to getting to peace remain; it was enough for Trump to declare victory in his allotted three minutes and five seconds, and head home.

Trump called the event a 10 out of 10 in his post meeting asspatting from Sean Hannity, the World’s Most Embarrasing Irishman. It didn’t matter there were no concrete deliverables from the event, no matter there were no summaries of the areas of agreement (that don’t exist), nothing to worry about that even Trump acknowledged big areas of disagreement remain.

Remember: nothing in Reality TV is what it appears to be. Trump cosplayed the role of Summit Host, but it was Putin who was the center of attention, the person who spoke first at the post-event press conference, the one who clearly set the rules going forward. It’s reported that what passes for the president’s “national security teams” at least has the low cunning to realize how intransigent Putin remained in private on the core issues of Russian claims on Ukrainian land and what kind of security guarantees he could find acceptable for what’s left of Ukraine. In other words, once again, Trump got fully played by Putin, who granted Trump just enough of a “victory” for the cameras while sending a message that’s unmistakable to those who really understand, that Trump is weak - a stooge, a transitory character in the play - that he will use and move on from. And Trump knows it.

How much does Putin disrespect Trump? Well, within hours of his depature from Anchorage, Russian State TV released behind-the-scenes video that shows Trump fawning over Putin as they stand backstage before going out to put on the “press conference” act. Trump can be seen laughing as he spoke to Putin. He then embraces Putin with a two-hand handshake., then turns and shakes the hand of Putin’s translator, the only other person present at the meeting.

This morning, in another rant on Lies Anti-Social, Trump split from European leaders and Zelenskyy, announcing he was adopting Putin’s preferred strategy for pursuing a sweeping peace agreement instead of the urgent cease-fire Trump said he wanted before the meeting. He wrote: “It was determined by all that the best way to end the horrific war between Russia and Ukraine is to go directly to a Peace Agreement, which would end the war, and not a mere Ceasefire Agreement, which often times do not hold up.”

In response, Britain, France, and Germany announced they will increase economic penalties on Russia “as long as the killing in Ukraine continues.”

But Putin said he appreciated Trump’s efforts to bring peace. Please alert the Nobel Prize committee in Oslo, Trump’s getting tired of his pleading phone calls being stiffed by Jens Stollenberg.

Trump humiliated and lowered the US’s standing in the world by getting rolled by Putin in public like this.

And now Volodomyr Zelenskyy - the one honest man in this whole shitshow - must come to Saddam’s Whorehouse on Monday, to be lectured by the Head Idiot and the Chief Fool, both of whom will tell him that he has to take the deal - the same way Chamberlain and Daladier told Edvard Beneš that he must cede the Sudetenland to Nazi Germany in order to achieve “peace in our time.”

The Russian war criminal probably could have gotten Trump to give him Ukraine if he’d troweled on one more layer of bullshit.

Even Fux Snooze got it: “The way that it felt in the room was not good. It did not seem like things went well. And it seemed like Putin came in and steam rolled, got right into what he wanted to say and got his photo next to the president and then left.”

The bottom line is, no matter what Trump does, no matter what shiny object he pulls out of his pocket and drops on the green to distract the Press Corpse, no matter what show he puts on, none of it is working. He cannot get away from the Epstein Files, and every single thing he has done demonstrates his desperation to get away. His desperation demonstrates that he knows what is in the files will kill him - politically and socially - when it’s revealed. For the first time in his life, Donald Trump is finding out that karma is indeed a bitch.

Sorry, there aren’t any cat pictures cute enough to put this aside.

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