Today is Day 165 of Grampa Shitstain’s war on everything and everyone good and decent who will collaborate and give this broken piece of shit the slightest acceptance. There are 489 days till we destroy the worthless motherfuckers and their billionaire owners who today think they can rob us blind and that we’ll “get over it.” The fuck we will!!!
As awful as the news of the past five days has been, the news today doesn’t get any better.
It was announced yesterday that the U.S. is halting shipments of weapons to Ukraine amid concerns that its own stockpiles have declined too much. Certain munitions were previously promised to Ukraine under the Biden administration to aid its defenses during the more than three-year-old war. The pause reflects a new set of priorities under President Putin’s Dumbfucking Punk, after Defense Department officials scrutinized current U.S. stockpiles and raised concerns. The statement from the spokescum in Whitey’s House was: “This decision was made to put America’s interests first following a review of our nation’s military support and assistance to other countries across the globe. The strength of the United States Armed Forces remains unquestioned — just ask Iran.” While the Pentagon wouldn’t release a list of the weapons now embargoed, it’s a good guess they involve Patriot missiles and other defensive weapons to be used against Russia’s increasing drone assault against Ukraine. Once again, “Krasnov” proves he’s been in Putin’s pocket since the Soviets recruited him as a traitor back in 1987. The United States’ support for Ukraine has now collapsed, and with it, the global system of peace and security that has protected Americans for 80 years. No one will want us as an “ally.” Not even after Krasnov is gone, since we have so clearly demonstrated that the country can indeed be taken over by the illiterate clucks who used to be safely locked away in the attic.
Rand Paul on the Murkowski deal in which hypocrisy and spinelessness assured passage of the Big Bad Bill: "There was a time in which they had to make a decision, dealing with me and reducing the debt ceiling or giving pork and subsidies to Alaska. They chose to add more pork and subsidies for Alaska to secure that." Murkowski will never live down this act of treason against her country.
The kabuki shitshow continues, now sent to the House of Representatives: A cross-section of House Republicans — from hardline conservatives to moderates — will meet today with Grampa about the Big Bad Bill. The meetings come as GOP leaders are leaning on Republican holdouts who have voiced serious opposition to the bill, threatening leadership’s hopes of getting it to Whitey’s House by July 4. Hardliners are vowing to vote against the procedural rule for the bill, which would bring the House floor to a standstill. GOP sources say leaders are not interested in making any changes, arguing that the Senate made the bill more conservative in some areas and more moderate in other areas, but it is overwhelmingly similar to what the House passed last month. (Except for the fact that it cuts far more than even the Fweedumberers thought they could get.) Moderate Reps. Mike Lawler David Valadao, and Dan Newhouse were spotted entering the West Wing this morning. Centrists have raised concerns about the Medicaid cuts in the bill and the aggressive rollback of green-energy tax credits, some of which benefit their districts. Corporal Couchfucker urged Republicans to brush aside concerns about deficits and Medicaid reforms in order to fuel the mass deportation agenda with the billions for ICE, border agents, a border wall and other immigration enforcement priorities. “Moderate” Don Bacon demonstrated how it will be a good thing when he’s gone and a Democrat replaces him, telling a reporter, “I do think making the tax rates permanent, great plus ups in defense spending and added border security are huge assets to this bill.” Retired Chair Farce Generals like him should never be allowed to make any decision more important than whether or not to order takeout Chinese for the luncheon. The latest news is that a five-minute vote on the motion to proceed with the Senate bill has remained open for more than an hour, and leadership has told House lawmakers they can leave the floor. An earlier procedural vote was also held open for an hour, preventing the chamber from voting on a rule for the Big Bad Bill. Ex-SEAL and right wing idiot Wicsonsin Rep. Derrick Van Orden said, “The president of the United States didn't give us an assignment. We're not a bunch of little bitches around here, okay? I'm a member of Congress. I represent almost 800,000 Wisconsinites.” At this point, I will take opposition from wherever it can be found, so “Thanks a lot, Chief.” That is, if you carry through and actually do it. Which will surprise me.
Roscoe will have you know he’s as smart as he looks.
CBS News parent Paramount Global has agreed to pay $16 million to resolve an extortion threat made by President Dilbert Dumbfuck over a “60 Minutes” news report last fall. The long-gestating and highly controversial settlement payment was announced by Paramount late last night. The Paramount announcement said the $16 million sum “includes plaintiffs’ fees and costs,” and will not be paid to Dilbert directly, but instead will be allocated to his future presidential library (which will never be built since he is illiterate) mirroring a settlement agreement that Disney’s ABC struck with Trump last December. “The settlement does not include a statement of apology or regret,” Paramount specified. It’s still the most spineless, scummiest, embarrassing surrender to the criminal in Whitey’s House by any of the Vichy pissants.
Disgruntled Republicans sick of being bullied by Donald Trump and Democrat “centrists” (i.e., Clintonista scum) imperiled by the Left are secretly having conversations about forming a third party. The usual DC Vichy “Democrat” suspects are involved. They promise they are excluding Elmo, who has promised to create his own third party. Even dumbasses like Mark Penn know poison when they see it. Negotiations are said t o be “at an early, but promising, stage.” Some “serious” names are involved and, if agreement can be reached, they believe it could transform the face of U.S. politics. The names involved are said to be of “national significance,” although they have not necessarily all decided to break away from the two-party structure. The talks are continuing in private. If you want to know who the “nationally significant” circle jerkers are, just consider all the Dumbocraps who don’t have the courage to register as Republicans you have wished over the years could be thrown out a sixth floor window in Washington, plus all the over-educated, under-intelligent, otherwise-unemployable white boys of the DC Press Corpse whose bullshit in the nation’s finest fishwrap you no longer read, and you’ll be able to “round up the usual suspects.” Clintonista Mark Penn, my own personal candidate for being thrown out a window, went on Fux Snooze to say that Mamdani’s candidacy is a “911 moment” for the Democrats (maybe the Clintonista Vichy Democrats who still believe “The West Wing” wasn’t a fantasy with all those “reasonable Republicans” President Clinton, er, I mean Bartlett could work with successfully) and calling Mamdani “an antisemitic socialist.” Go fuck yourself in your face repeatedly, you fatassed piece of Clinton Shit. (I’m still proud I didn’t vote for that southern-fried pissant twice.)
Remember how Grampa told us everything would be wonderful for the economy if he got back in office? Microsoft just put the lie to that this morning, announcing the company is getting rid of 9,000 jobs company-wide. The company began notifying employees this morning of the layoffs, which will shrink Microsoft by 4%. The part of the company most affected is the Xbox division. Is it a coinkydink that Xboxes are made in China? I think not. Microsoft’s new job losses follow layoffs in May and June that together culled 6,000 positions. The layoffs are terrible news for employees, but Microsoft’s share price makes clear that the company itself is feeling fine. With its stock soaring, AI projects booming, and executive compensation spiking to eye-watering new heights, Microsoft is looking to further supercharge its business, not to course correct. In other words, the same old same old of the enshittification of America.
There is good news amongst the kabuki bullshit: U.S. District Court Judge Randolph Moss blocked Dilbert Dipshit’s asylum ban at the southern border, determining it ran afoul of immigration laws protecting the rights of those seeking refuge in the U.S. He blocked Dilbert’s Day 1 order seeking to end asylum for all but those who entered the U.S. at ports of entry, saying Dilbert went beyond his authority in drastically limiting asylum for those fleeing persecution and danger. Judge Moss found the order violated the Immigration and Nationality Act (INA), which lays out strict guidelines for who qualifies for asylum and how they can seek the protections – including by crossing between ports of entry. Moss wrote in his 128-page opinion: “Nothing in the INA or the Constitution grants the President or his delegees the sweeping authority asserted in the Proclamation and implementing guidance,”
Here’s some good news: the annual Independence Day traditions in Pacific Palisades and Altadena will go on in the aftermath of January’s wildfires. In the Palisades, the annual parade is a tradition dating back 78 years, and while it won’t be in the neighborhood this year, Palisades residents are emcouraged to join the fun at nearby Paul Revere Middle School. In Altadena, the annual informal red-white-and-blue Pepper Drive Parade will be open to the public as scheduled.
In personal good news, my publisher approved my latest book proposal for “Achtung Jabos!” the story of the Ninth Air Force from D-Day to V-E Day at their marketing meeting this morning in Cambridge UK. I don’t know why I sweat these out, but I do. As my editor said when notifying me, “You have an excellent track record here.” “Bloody Skies” - the history of the “forgotten” Fifteenth Air Force will be out in February 2026.
D. Earl Stephens gets today’s last word: “This summer, we are under brutal attack by a mad king who is intent on getting even for every awful thing that has made him miserable the past 79 years. Because he can’t escape his pathetic life, he is spending his summer making sure ours is as terrible as possible. “
Comments are for paid subscribers.
Roscoe looks all-knowing! Great pics!
I’m too lazy to look back to see what Dave Conant said the other day when he encouraged you to stop restraining your feelings, for fear you might suffer an ulcer or worse…
Between you and JoJo from Jerz, I marvel at the imagery, vocabulary of choice and more… I’m definitely modeled after the Allen portion of Burns and Allen… I take it in and appreciate it deeply, but could never originate it. Wowser.
For sure, it provides a release vicariously. Love it. Thanks.
And with today’s double post, I feel very caught up on the latest.
Congrats on the book agreement. Yayeeeeee
Looking forward to the new book!