POKING AROUND - 11/23/24
Today’s theme is:
Looking around yesterday and this morning at the “Jesus Fucking Christ! Are they really this fucking stupid?” news.
This tops the list:
32,000 PEOPLE IN PENNSYLVANIA VOTED HARRIS FOR PRESIDENT BUT THEN VOTED FOR LEILA HAZOU, THE GREEN PARTY CANDIDATE FOR SENATE.
As a result, Bob Casey lost re-election by 16,349 votes, thereby giving the GOP a comfortable 53-47 majority in the Senate which means that if all of the GOP “moderates”vote against a Trump appointee, that scumbag will still be approved 51-50 with Corporal Couchfuck making his tie-breaking vote . If you had also voted for Casey, he would have won, giving some small hope of blocking at least the worst of the worst of Trump‘s gargoyle nominees. Word is that many of you drooling fucking idiots did this because you were “frustrated” over the Biden Administration’s position on Gaza and “wanted to send a message.” Well, you fucking dildos, I hope YOU got the message: your stupid fucking “frustrated vote” got you a GOP solid-majority US Senate, whose members will be happy as hell to vote to confirm “Christian Zionist” former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee to be the next American ambassador to Israel. Since you fuckwits are obviously illiterate, which is your excuse for not knowing the news, Ambassador Fuckabee is good buddies with Benjamin Nitwityahoo, for whom the International Criminal Court just issued an arrest warrant for the war crimes he ordered the IDF to commit in Gaza over the past 12 months. Additionally, Fuckabee doesn’t believe “Palestinians” exist, and supports the plans of Nitwityahoo’s pet Jewish Nazis, Bezalel Smotrich and admitted domestic terrorist Itamir Ben Gvir, who want to annex the West Bank - which also “doesn’t exist” in Fuckabee’s mind - making it part of Greater Israel as Judea and Samaria. AND he’s good with the Israelis putting settlers in Gaza. You shitforbrains ignoramuses, your itty-bitty brains were “frustrated,” so you voted for the candidate of a party that regularly sells itself out to Republicans to draw votes from Democrats (like you!!!) And guarantee Republican victories. Do you morons have your shoes tied for you in the morning? Do people have to remind you to “breathe in, breathe out”??? In case you were wondering, you embarrassments are the ones H.L. Mencken had in mind when he said nobody ever went broke underestimating your “intelligence.” Kindly go drop dead the bunch of you, you fucking MORONS.
ELMO MUCK CONTINUES TO BE AN UNRECONSTRUCTED AFRIKANER FUCKWIT.
Elmo Leon Muck claimed yesterday that more than half of America voted for Trump and “he won the popular vote by a decisive margin!” The updated popular vote is Trump 49.87%, Harris 48.25% - for the arithmetically-challenged like our “Chief Engineer,” that’s a 1.62% margin of “victory.” If you really think that’s a landslide, you braindead fucking Nazi, Lyndon Johnson would like to talk to you about his 1948 Senate campaign, and Ronald Reagan is laughing his ass off at you, Tinny Toy Boy.
WHAT THE HELL DOES TRUMP HAVE ON “MIZ LINDSAY” ANYWAY?
No, I really don’t want to know the answer to that rhetorical question. But Miz Lindsay continues to show how a person whose backbone is a single overcooked strand of Angel Hair pasta can hang upright in a closet (hint: pay no attention to all the wires to his shoulders and hands and feet that keep him dancing worse than Howdy Doody ever did). Here he is congratulating Trump for replacing Florida’s Favorite Pedophile with Florida’s Favorite Two-Faced Lawyer, Pam Bondi: “Well done, Mr. President. Picking Pam Bondi for AG is a grand slam, touchdown, hole in one, ace, hat trick, slam dunk, Olympic gold medal pick.”
In addition to calling off the Florida AG investigation of Trump University in 2013, in return for what was later found to be an illegal campaign donation of $25,000 from the later-found-to-be-a-fraud Trump Foundation, and also in addition to being his defense lawyer in the first impeachment as well as a lead attorney in the “stop the steal” legal chicanery in 2020, Pammykins is also the sister of the lawyer who represented Elmo and his Tinny Toy Company when he was charged with securities fraud by the SEC. I’ll take the under on how many days it takes Bottle Blondie to tell her minions at the Department of Injustice to drop that one. You gotta hand it to Elmo, he did indeed get a wide ranging return on his $135 million investment in Trump Mafia Inc.
THE GREAT SELLOFF OF “LEGACY MEDIA” TAKES THE TURNOFF TO CRAZYTOWN
On Friday November 15, Brian Roberts, CEO of Comcast-Universal, announced the creation of SpinCo, the corporate entity with a “For Sale” sign in the front window that he intends to stuff full of all the “legacy media” cable outfits Comcast-Universal owns that together represent 2% of their total income from cable (the other 98% coming from Bravo Channel, home of the Crazy Bimbo Housewives of WhereTheFuck show, which they’re keeping since that’s what keeps their Peacock streamer on life support) - which will include MSNBC. Yesterday, Don Jr. stopped snorting cocaine long enough to sniff that Elmo ought to consider buying the company and doing to MSNBC what he did to Xitter (that’s still pronounced “shitter”). And guess what? The Space Nazi said he’s considering it. Will he give Steve Bannon Rachel’s time slot??? Will Charlie Kirk get Lawrence’s place? Can Glenn Beck get Nicole’s afternoons? He’s sure to keep Joe and Mika. Get your bets in early, folks.
SENATOR SCHUMER STILL HAS HIS HEAD UP HIS ASS
Thursday night, Democratic Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer - a man you have to admire for his unrelenting 24-7/365 campaign to disprove the ancient anti-Semitic slur that all Jews are really smart - made a deal with the Republican MINORITY in the Senate to get quick approval of ten Biden judicial nominees for Federal District Court Judgeships. How did he work this miracle? He promised not to present the four crucial Federal Appeals Court nominees for a vote. Given that no matter how many Republicans show up to vote “no,” and regardless of whether or not the two traitors Joe Manchin or Kyrsten Sinema vote “no” with the enemy, Schumer still has a majority vote with VP Harris casting the tie-breaker right up to close of business on January 2, 2025, I am left scratching my head at this one. But only for the two minutes it takes to remember every other goddamned nosedive New York’s Finest Senate Dipshit Not Named Gillibrand has taken in his illustrious career of Selling Out In Public.
THEY DESERVE TO GET IT GOOD AND HARD
Jeff Tiedrich points us to the news that MAGA voters will go out and shear the sheep and weave the wool to pull over their eyes all on their own when they need a good fantasy from Dear Leader. The latest one being a tale running around the far right swamp that Donnie is going to issue everyone a $2,000 stimulus check right after he takes office to help them deal with Biden’s terrible economy. I can’t even come up with words on my own for this, so I will defer to the Mussolini-loving H.L. Mencken, who observed that “As Democracy is perfected, the office of the president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day, the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by downright moron.” Also, “Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard.”
T-t-t-that’s all, folks!
That’s Another Fine Mess has learned that the new lease here, effective January 1, 2025, contains a substantial increase in rent (It’s L.A., surprise surprise) and in the security deposit. There are 3,600 free subscribers here. If 10% of you were to become paid subscribers at the $7/month level, this problem would be permanently solved. Please consider this. Your support now in these times is crucially important. So far, we have seen 10% of the hoped-for new paid subscribers step up to these challenging times.
Comments are for paid subscribers.
I had to stop drinking coffee, so my go-to for caffeine in the morning is one of those mini cans of diet Dr. Pepper. It's enough to wake me up but not enough to make me wish I had stayed in bed. It helps to have a morning dose of laughter to go with the bitter pills I must now swallow. This one is mahvelous, as they say in some circles. Your delicious barbs are such a welcome relief, it almost makes the day's news less painful. Someone posted Tom Hartmann's substack article from a couple of days ago; he recounts the myriad of connections that the convicted felon has had and continues to have with the Kremlin. Unfortunately for my digestive system, I read that before I read your daily "poke." But thank you anyway!
TC, I needed this today. I speak profanity and sarcasm with supervisor rated 100% fluency and have been sputtering incoherently for a week. My wife is a freaking basket case so I limit my expressions of disgust.
Where the fuck is the party that has less than two months with the executive branch and Senate? Do the things, people, do the goddamn things that need to be done before everything goes in the shitter.